Oh my.

From The Wall Street Journal, May 27, 2011:

It was understood that the end of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" would occasion tears and star-studded extravaganzas. And there were, in those farewell ceremonies, images that couldn't fail to move audiences: such as the solemn march of 200 Morehouse College graduates in the Surprise Spectacular broadcast this week—just some of the men whose higher education Oprah had paid for.

The events produced another bit of news this week, albeit of a less inspiring kind: the adventures of Robert Spearing, a Canadian so desperate to explain what happened to the farewell-show tickets he'd—falsely—told his wife he had that he hit on the idea of an invented mugging. He consequently tore his hands up on concrete and cut himself on the head for good measure. Nothing persuaded the police, who hit him with a felony charge.